I knew that I didn’t need a husband or approval from the church to enjoy my sexuality
I came upon a copy of Sex at Dawn, a nonfiction book about why human beings are evolutionarily predisposed to be non-monogamous
Then I discovered polyamory. The book was very funny and informative and I read it at lightning speed in three days. I especially enjoyed the accounts of cultures that do not have ple, Polynesian tribes that encouraged their women to be promiscuous with outsiders in order to strengthen the gene pool on isolated island communities; native South American women who would have sex with as many men as possible while trying to conceive because they believe that more than one father contributed to a baby’s genetics; or the Asian tribe where women took on as many lovers as they wanted because the women raised offspring with their birth families. I became fascinated with the topic and began to learn as much as I could on the internet and from books.
The liberation I felt at learning about polyamory was like the liberation I felt at abandoning my Mormon beliefs. I realized that I no longer had to stuff myself into this box that society had imposed on me all my life. I no longer had to feel like a deviant or a slut for not conforming comfortably to this box. Outside the box is a whole world with many options that I had never known about before. Polyamory was not just an alternative to monogamy, it was the discovery that we can each create the world that we want to live in. From open relationships to polyfidelity to solo polyamory, there are so many ways that people can come together without breaking others apart. The world was suddenly wide open, full of tenderness and possibility.
Some people say that they are poly by orientation, others say it is a lifestyle. It dawned on me that in my fantasies of my ideal life I never pictured myself as wife to one husband Cologne in Germany women hot. (más…)
